The Infertile & Fertile Friendship

Just a little note... I do realize I have been neglecting my blog, and to any readers who might be out there, I apologize. I have been terribly sick lately, and I've been struggling to get even my homework done. Anyway, I have been pondering this next blog post the last few weeks, and now that I'm feeling a little better, I thought it would be a great opportunity. 

So here we go... how can a fertile be an infertile's friend? 

1. Do ask her to hang out still. Even if she is hesitant and standoffish, I guarantee she will appreciate the offer. There are times when infertiles want to crawl in a hole and hide from every fertile in the world, but that doesn't mean she wants you to stop caring or trying. One day she will return the favor and be active in asking to hang out too.

2. Do ask her about her fertility woes. Just like any fertile would love to talk about their pregnancy or kids, an infertile (out of the closet that is) will likely love the opportunity to ramble about their treatments, feelings, etc.

3. Be sensitive in announcing your new pregnancy. Text or email is probably the best way to go... she likely isn't going to want to be on the phone or in person when she has herself a good cry.  Let her come to terms with the news and know that just because she might not be happy with you, she is more than likely happy for you.

4. Don't discount her for fun activities like trips to the zoo or baby showers. Yes, those trips and events can be a tough experience, but not being invited hurts even more. 

5. Don't expect her to be ready for the fertile world when she finally beats infertility. Being an infertile is not something that goes away with a positive pregnancy test. Chances are she will still be a nervous wreck and terrified something can go wrong at any moment. Respect her inhibitions and be there for her.