marks the end of the 16th month of trying to have a baby. In fact, the test to see if my tubes are clear will be the first day of our 17th month. What makes it even more unfair is that instead of being excited to know I have been married to my dear husband for 16 months, I think about how it marks 16 months of unsuccessful efforts in trying to conceive. A friend of mine starting trying to have a baby a month or two before me. She just posted that she was getting her son's 6 month pictures done. Nothing like a stab in the gut to read that. No offense to her as she is more than welcome to post happy things about her happy life with her happy kid. It's just a real eye-opener to know just how long we have been trying and unhappily being reminded it isn't happening.
My husband keeps telling me to remain positive. He's got that outlook in life where he knows everything will happen when it's meant to be. Me, on the other hand, I'm frantically holding onto what seems impossible praying it will one day become a reality. This week I've also decided to truly make our spare bedroom a guest bedroom. I have had enough of looking at a closed door to an empty room with a rocking chair and book shelf. I will be putting up the futon, cleaning out the closet, and keeping the door open.
Hopefully it'll be just your luck, you fix up the guest room to look absolutely perfect and then get a BFP.
ReplyDeleteWhen it happens... I bet the 16 months won't matter :)
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